• Paul Gordon

How your partner's attitude to money is affecting the relationship

Updated: Jun 29, 2021

A spender date

Spender 1: I like to eat out and travel. You never know when you are going to die, so just have a life.  If that means a bit of overspend that’s bad luck. 

Agreement abounds.

Spender 2: I too want to enjoy my life. I feel like money is a pain in the arse.  I love earning it and I love spending it.


The catchcry of a spender date.... "What great joy.  We want everything now. We deserve it."

Are these people crazy.  Surely restraint is in order!  Not for them.  They enjoy the excitement of spending. Are they bad people?  Are they to be judged?  Or are they a perfect match?

Well, maybe some perspective is needed.

Spenders enjoy the excitement of a purchase.  They rarely suffer buyers regret. Their Spenditude does not define them - they just happen to enjoy spending. 

Spenders are often attracted to spenders. Their "let’s just do this" motto is fun, exhilarating even. Spenders get frustrated with restriction. Though, in their quieter moments they sometimes crave the feeling that someone will ensure everything will be ok.

Are spenders best to stick with their own kind? Or not?

Opposites attract

Could a spender and a defender be a match made in heaven? Can they form an amazing partnership?

Defenders don't mind spending - but they hate waste. The creative, dreaming, invigorating ideas of a spender, combined with the goal setting and planning of a defender. It's like having your cake and eating it too. Spenders and defenders can form an amazing partnership.

I have a GSOH, like to eat out, travel and I am a spender.

I like long walks on the beach, am fit and most importantly, I'm a defender.

Swipe right.

And for Slenders? You can go either way and make it work.  If you date another Slender, be sure to share your Spenditude. You may find you are both on the cusp of habit changing Defender behaviours or on the edge of a Spend-a-thon.  

Do yourself a favour and share your Spenditude on the first date. It may actually change your life. 

Share your Spenditude dating stories with us at

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